Judist's Lair

Let's see who my friends REALLY are

Actually the Polls below are fully anonymous, but I am curious who is doing what

NOW VOTE!!!

there is no hanky-panky at the ballot table

Yes kids, you heard me right. This is the Elections BC version of the no sex in the champagne room. I was not sure whether the reference was in “funny stuff” with the ballots or attempting to seduce the voting clerk.

Given that the judist will be serving his country (and naturally his wallet) by working as a Certificate Writer and an Absentee Voting Officer during the BC elections (Go Green Go) I had to attend a training session today. With exception of the utter lack of oxygen in the room (and they wonder why Canadians are so docile), the session was as expected, dry, boring, and full of crazy retired people. I don’t care what they say, Ross Perot was right, old people need to be isolated and studied so it can be determined what nutrients they have that might be extracted for our personal use. BTW, the production company who made the instructional video for this “course” wins the prize for the least informational documentary of the year and the creepiest use of crappy digital synths in a government setting. Next thing you know they’ll be working for Michael Moore…or maybe they already are…tum tum tum…*cue in conspiracy music*

Now, for some public service announcements:

GO AND VOTE….I don’t care who you vote for, but preferably Green. And remember, even if you don’t like ANY of the alternatives, and in that case I do suggest you vote Green, you can refuse your ballot. You voice will be counted as being the whining, new age yuppy-hippy, yoga pretzeling, latte guzzling, seawall walking SOB that you are.

For those of you domiciled in a cave, the election is May 17^th and you can vote in any voting station. It doesn’t matter whether you are actually registered (although does help), they can register you on the spot. Advanced voting will also occur on May 11-14.

STV? Do you know what that means? No, it does not stand for Sexually Transmitted Values, you are not at risk of becoming a better person. But, if you are tired of having the meaningless majority governments that make you wish for the happy days of sniper rifles and clock towers, you should find out about the Single Transferable Vote proposal recommended by a panel of ordinary citizens after much consultation with the public, and being decided via a public referendum concurrent with the election. Elections officers are not allowed to answer questions about STV, so if you have been living in a hole for the past 6 months GO AND LEARN ABOUT IT.

This concludes today’s rant…I would just like to mention that being a responsible citizen and serving my country is naturally compensated for anti-social behavior manifested through driving at excessive rates of speed and scaring fellow drivers and poor defenseless passengers. Sorry Petr!

most creative "i can't help you" excuse

With friends like this who needs movers?

[10:25] Craft Of Empty House (http://judist.blogspot.com): wanna help? LOL
[10:26] (LAZY_BASTARD_NAME_REMOVED) ermmm...I have....to masturbate...all day....I think...
[10:26] Craft Of Empty House (http://judist.blogspot.com): a commendable pursuit

The box saga continues and I have discovered two valuable things

a) people at Canadian Tire are very nice...and don't care at all about loss prevention. They gave me a crate full of brand new boxes.

b) Banana boxes rock and are available at your local safeway.

Now for the true substance of my post. How the hell do I manage to fit so much useful junk into a 1 bedroom apartment? Futhermore, as cupboards and shelves empty out, the boxes manage to take up more room than the belongings did in their respective places. It's official, I am transporting air.

You know what the worst part is? There is nothing to throw out!!! Well perhaps I am lying, there is nothing that I want to throw out. Alas, i am a slave to my belongings.

of boxes and anal security measures

So I need boxes to move…yes I do…is that really a surprise. I figured, hey, London Drugs get products in boxes…perhaps they would be willing to donate for a worthy cause. Seems logical right? Alas, no, as was told to me by an ultra-hot cashier, who could barely keep a straight face:

Our policy does not allow us to give out boxes. They all have to go into recycling. Something to do with loss prevention.

What would you do?

Personally I am planning a clandestine mission to the London Drugs recycling bin under the cover of darkness. Are you in???

web weather

ok, for someone who is more HTML literate than myself. I want to have the current weather displayed on the page and instead of reverse engineering Environment Canada/CBC or weather.ca feeds I was hoping to find a pre-existing snippet of code. Anyone know of something like this?

ok, this was (un)surprisingly easy. Graham from my home away from home pointed me in the right direction.

Also I am open to more ideas of what I should add here....or perhaps shut it down entirely :P

My new business idea.....couple of hundred of these adds placed in the West End and in Kits. Considering how many unsecured access points there are around here.....

Exammed, Wrecked, Beached, Happy

exams ended with a ... sound of the waves crashing on wreck beach, sounds of a guitar played near a campfire, and of course mass quantities of alcohol being consumed on a secluded beach at the western apex of GVRD. I was on hand to party and provide transportation, and Louis Lane was on hand to document the entire evening)

I must say it was a very anticlimactic ending.....ofcourse I am not sure what exactly was expected, but some fanfare was definitely in order...I'd even settle for a Pipes and Drums marching band.

Being the usual social butterfly (ok, I don't make a convincing butterfly, I am open to suggestions on this one) I shunned the people my small group except for the few fellow judists who came with me to join BANE at Earl's. (BTW, while on the subject of Earl's, their chicken vindaloo while exceptionally tasty is anything BUT a chicken vindaloo. However that should not stop you from trying it). I guess we sort of crashed that party as the reservation for 6 swelled to 22 by the time the food came. It's funny how we are always so apologetic to the waiters when we need more tables/chairs/drinks...you'd think what do they care..more money for them!

For those of you who expected a nite out on the out...I am sorry to disappoint you. The thought of going to Caprice (Law School Party) had as much attraction as a waxing a flaming pontiac with my tongue. Wreck Beach however was the spot du jour conceived and contrived by Kasia and Nancy who rock! With my self-appointed chaperone by my side (also known as a scrub = Mike), we headed to Robin's, where, as the God's were clearly smiling on us, we were able to kidnap Heather with her guitar and head to the beach. The rest is self explanatory from the pictures below, although I wish computers had some olfactory capabilities, the smell of smoked moose embedded in my jacket is something to preserve for future generations. (anyone know why floatsam smells like tanned moose?)

As more pictures will be emailed to me I will update this post.

P.S. Robin, just for you